That time Molly shouted PENIS in the hardware store.

We’re in the local hardware store. You know that old school kind – part hardware, part hoarders episode.

Matt is trolling the aisles looking for a wrench. Owen and Molly are oohing and aahing like they’re in a museum. So many little treasures!

Suddenly: “MOMMY! You have GOT to see this.”

I look toward Owen and see a cherubim-like figurine. “Aw, that’s cute, buddy.”

“Mommmm.” He points to the figurine again. His eyes plead for me to look closer.

I nod and smile at his bizarre eclectic taste.

“NEENER NEENER NEENER,” he sings loudly while pointing to his boy parts.

“What are you doing, son!?”

He looks again to the figurine which I finally notice is anatomically correct. And male.

Matt and Molly arrive on the scene. Molly proceeds to shout, “”LOOK, Mommy! It has a PENIS!”

Matt bursts out laughing. (Of course, this is Molly’s cue to repeat whatever she just did.)

cherubWe then walk the full length of the store to the register while Molly proclaims in varied tone and volume, “PENIS. PENIS. PENIS.”

Matt is laughing. Owen is doing some sort of jig. I, meanwhile, am receiving two disapproving looks, one snicker, and a full-out glare from my fellow shoppers.


But, if you’re in need of one, be sure to check your local hardware store.


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